restless leg syndrome. good lord have mercy, its just doing me in. i did not have it with eden but it has come on strong in the last few weeks and it is making me think i have lost my mind. my quads are cold and tingling all day and night and it makes me feel like there are little critters crawling up and down my legs and my arms and shoulders. i sit at my desk and bounce my legs around all day trying to make me feel a little less crazy, but its getting to my head. most people tell me they just have it at night but im getting it all the live long day.
and i also have heartburn again pretty intensely. it kept me up till 1 am recently because i could not lay down without it getting a lot worse. maybe ill get another daughter with a head full of hair, if wives tales mean anything at all. and nausea is back in pretty strong force. not throwing up but maybe every other day or so, but its still SO old at this point.
i finally went through the mountains of clothes that we have in storage that eden cant wear anymore. and let me say, i don't need any little girl clothes. i may want them because i have a small addiction tendency toward shopping for my daughters, but i dont need them. it took me two hours to sort through two years of clothes. and now its finally done which makes me feel much more ready. i also need to pre-wash all the cloth diapering supplies in the next bit and pack my hospital bag. more on that later.
and of course I have been thinking about birth again. im attempting a second delivery sans intervention but i also been praying alot and preparing my heart to be content with whatever way sweet girl arrives. childbirth, like our children, is something that we ultimately can't control. i can make a plan and be proactive and visualize and stretch, but none of those things guarantee me any specific outcome. so i am trying to adjust my heart so that i trust God's perfect providence over her arrival, and his love for her and his love for me.
the view from where i sit
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