so long, farewell

about a year ago i was home, at my childhood home, for what i thought would be the last time and i wrote THIS POST about how incredibly mixed my emotions were.  i thought it would be the last time i ever went home, but sadly it was not.  i traveled home one more time, in december, to bury the man who was like a second father to me.  and number eight was an incredible place for us to gather together and remember the way his tenor voice and his delightful laugh had once filled the halls.  it was the perfect place to say goodbye to Tom because its where i have the majority of my memories with him.  it feels like im losing him all over again today, since ill never get to be there again, or look around and know, 'hey, i was here with Tom, and it was great'.  so that's hard today.

yesterday my parents signed the final papers to transfer ownership of our place to some new family. a new family with young kids, who want to build their lives over top of our memories.  and its not so much about the physical place, though it is a beautiful house, its about the time logged. we have logged the hours there that we wont ever log anywhere else as a family.  the five of us Jordans will never spend years and years of countless time together, in each others' space, on each others' nerves, in each others' hearts, the way that we did there.  we wore  in the floorboards with hurried and excited steps as we did the day in and day business of life.  we filled each room with life.

i have not lived there in 12 years, since i was 18, but even though i was not there, my parents still were, at time with my siblings.  the people i know and love still gathered there. 

it was still our place.  our home base.

yet, and at some point today my parents will walk out of the house they built, look at it one last time, hug each other, get in the car and pull away.  and it will be over.  the ending of an era.  the beginning of a new era.
my childhood bedroom and the bathroom i shared with elise.

and its just hitting me hard today people.  i cried many a tear silently in the early hours of the morning while making oatmeal.

you were so so good to us number eight.  thank you for that, and farewell

Comments