please remember not to forget (part 1)

at least once a day the thought runs through my mind 'write that down laura, you will want to remember this'.  sometimes its something eden did.  sometimes its a way that my heart feels when she looks at me or i sneak into her room to watch her sleep.  i feel like someone is carving my heart out with a spoon, but in a good way.  i feel pangs in my chest when i look at her.  its wonderful and frightening at the same time.  oh to love someone so much.  

lately there are so many firsts.  first time standing, clapping, walking with my hands, mama and dada sounds.  the most precious feelings and moments threaten to slip through my fingers forgotten unless i am diligent about recording them.  there are so many moments i wish i could burn into my brain permanently or file away in a perfectly ordered and easily recallable system.

the way she does this bobble head thing, you know what i mean if you have seen her do it

the way she claps for herself after each bite of food because i used to clap for her to encourage her to put it in her mouth

the way she flaps her arms up and down and makes this really excited gaspy noise when she gets excited or sees a ceiling fan or a car (which we call zoom zooms)

the way she puts her bum up in the air when she sleeps

the way she does downward dog and sticks her bum and all her leggy rolls up into the air, no matter where we are

the content little sounds she makes when i am breastfeeding her

the way she plays with a fistfull of my shirt/hair/flesh while she is feeding

how she always pulls her socks of and sucks on them, rendering them soggy and useless

when she looks at me and i smile at her and i swear she knows what i am thinking. she does a little crooked smile like 'oh mom'

her babbles and squawks.

the way she forgets everything and focuses in so hard any time robert comes in the room

the way she is really clingy right now and sits by my feet holding onto my legs or leans toward me when someone else attempts to hold her

the amused look on her face after she has just sneezed

please please please remember not to forget these