Like a Skin

I love music.  I am not particularly musically inclined, though I do love to sing.  But I think I love music mostly because of how God uses songs and lyrics to speak to me, and to convict me of my own failures and sins.  I particularly love songs by Sara Groves because her lyrics always say what I WISH I could say.

THIS song, Like a Skin, is one that has had a huge impact on me recently.

The butterfly can just look back 
Flap those wings and say Oh, yeah
I never have to be a worm again

The snake gets tired of being him 
He wriggles from that itchy skin
Leaves it lying where he’s been and moves on

I’ve been longing for something tangible
Some kind of proof that there’s been change in me

Feels like I have been waking up
Only to fight with the same old stuff
Change is slow and it fills me with such doubt
Come on New Man where have you been?
Help me wriggle from this self I’m in
And leave it like a skin upon the ground 

I hear these words and it just resonates with my soul...I long for something tangible to leave behind, a mile marker for me to see in my rear view mirror.  Something that I am truly free from and is no longer a part of me.  I know that God has forgiven my sin, and that it has all been paid for, but I long to see irrefutable proof of growth in my life.  
Proof that I have been transformed by the renewal of my mind,

There are some days, by God's grace, where I am able to see that I have grown and overcome certain sins in my life.  But many more days, I feel like the last part of the song is true; i wake up to deal with a self that resembles the old me far too much.

And its times like this that I LONG for Heaven and the chance to have fellowship with the Father, the Son, the Spirit, and the church without any sin at all.